Perspective

“Therefore we do not lose heart.  Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.  For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal weight of glory that far outweighs them all.  So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen.  For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.”  2 Corinthians 4:16-18

Do you ever lose perspective?  I know at times I do.  Webster defines perspective as, “the ability to see things in their true relationships.”  An artist can create the illusion of perspective on a canvas by painting objects in their correct depth relationships.  Spiritually speaking, perspective comes when we seek to view events in our lives from God’s vantage point rather than our own.  Only He has perfect vision.  Yet down here on earth, our view is often clouded by the temporal.  We need the Spirit to blow the fog from our soul so the eyes of our heart can gaze upon the ruggedly beautiful mountains of God’s sovereignty and faithfulness.  Or, when the fog stubbornly refuses to clear, we must choose to see the mountains by faith.

God illuminated this truth to me in the midst of a family road trip.  Sometime after Hannah’s death, Dave and I thought it would be good for us to get away.  Some friends offered us their condo at Lake Tahoe for a week.  Since we would be heading north through the bowels of California, we decided to visit a few close friends along the way.

“Hey, what about visiting Hannah's doctor?” My husband queried.  While we were in San Diego, Hannah's doctor had been a youthful, cheerful man who brimmed with compassion for the children he treated.  Dave and I both agreed that he was one of the best doctors we could have asked for.  He would do anything to help if he felt that it was in the child’s best interest. 

Through different conversations we were aware that he was not a follower of Christ, although he was one of the nicest and most caring people you could ever meet.  “Wouldn’t he be an awesome Christian?!!” Dave and I would repeat to each other often, envisioning the effect his compassion would have on the world if it were fueled by the love of Christ.  We both remembered that Hannah's doctor had decided to leave his position in San Diego and opt for a quieter life in Central California.  He was tired of his young daughters thinking they had to be “Brittney Spears”, he had told us.

I love road trips, and it was fun to be together as a family.  I brought some games along to entertain C.J. in the car.  That evening we arrived in a small town outside of the bigger town where Hannah's doctor lived.  We searched through the small town streets until we found a Mexican restaurant that seemed popular with the locals, and decided to eat dinner there.  Since evening hadn’t yet wrapped the town in darkness, we strolled to the town square. Being from Southern California, where “downtown” means skycrapers rising toward the clouds and slow- flowing freeways bulging with cars, it seemed quaint to me to experience this “downtown”.  It had a certain nostalgic appeal.  “Is this what Mayberry was like?” I wondered with a chuckle. 

C.J. trotted around on the manicured lawn that sprawled in front of a large brick building.  My eyes were immediately drawn to a gigantic mural that decorated the entire side of the building.  As darkness finally pressed down upon the town, flood lights popped on, illuminating the scene of an orange grove. Workers dotted the panorama, strong arms outstretched in search of ripe citrus.  The colors were so vivid and the painting so vast that it captivated my imagination.

Since C.J. was occupied with skipping around on the grass, I decided to move closer and inspect the mural.  I climbed up onto a brick walkway that spanned the length of the building. Positioning myself next to a flood light, I gazed intently at the little section of painting illuminated by the glow.  To my surprise, the crisp colors I had enjoyed from farther off blurred in front of my eyes into a mass of dark green blobs.  It was actually ugly.  The little piece of the painting I was looking at made no sense.

At that moment, I felt God gently whisper to my heart.  He said, “Linda, right now your life feels a lot like those dark smears of paint.  The pain of Hannah’s death looms large and ugly before your eyes.  But when you step back and look at things from my perspective, I will make all things beautiful.”

Tears welled up in my eyes as I stretched out my hand to gently caress the wall.  I realized that God was calling me to trust Him with my pain, to believe that He really does know what He’s doing, and that He does have a plan to orchestrate the lives of all believers (even the ugly parts) into a glorious mural of praise to Him.  From our earthly perspective, it doesn’t make sense, but He can see the end from the beginning.

Sometimes He gives us a little glimpse into the grandness of his plan.  The next morning as we met Hannah's doctor for breakfast, can you guess where he took us to eat?  Yes, to a little café right next to the mural.  And as our conversation unfolded, we learned with great joy that he and his wife had recently come to know the Lord Jesus.  And, that they had also recently bought the brick building with the mural on it and planned to turn it into a clinic to help provide medical care for migrant farm workers.  Wow – our God truly is amazing.  He truly is the Master Artist.  Praise Him for his sovereignty, and for allowing us to see just a small glimpse of the view from his perspective!

Enjoy the Ride

You can tell I've been busy when I don't post for six months! Oh, how the time goes by! It has been a crazy ride since we left Indonesia on June 2 and headed for the States. We spent the first month moving our of our house and preparing it to rent. Praise the Lord we have a great tenant in there right now. Then we spent time in San Diego visiting family and friends, churches and supporters. On the way back from San Diego, we road tripped through Arizona to see my grandma and other family members before coming back to Idaho and preparing to go to the Mid-West and Philadelphia to visit out there. I guess you can see why I haven't blogged, huh? Below is a picture of our family with my Grandma Evelyn. She finally got to meet Ryan!

We have immensely enjoyed our time of visiting with everyone! But, like the conscientious first-borns that we are, Dave and I found ourselves really tired as we were driving back again to California in late September. We had been working so hard trying to raise our support for MAF and not seeing a lot of results, and on the drive, Dave looked over at me and said, "You know, I think we just need to relax and enjoy the ride." A little taken back, I said, "what do you mean?" He continued, "We need to let God bring in our support. Let's not kill ourselves trying. We need to keep working at it, but I think we have to truly trust that God will do it, and I think He wants us to enjoy the ride." Wow. Profound words. I knew it was the Holy Spirit speaking through my husband. We both needed to hear that at that point. And, not long after, we got a phone call in the car from a gentleman whom we had never met asking if we needed support for our ministry. Wow. What a confirmation!

Now, it hasn't been easy to stay in that "enjoy the ride" mentality. We both find ourselves teetering on the see-saw of "doing it myself" versus "trust God and enjoy the ride." But, when we hit hard on the "doing it myself" side, God gently directs us back to trust in Him. Can anyone relate?

We are currently in San Diego and will be heading back to Nampa on November 15. While there we will pack our crates and then depart for Papua on December 8. Please pray for us as we prepare to say our good-byes to our family and friends stateside. It will be hard to leave them. But we carry on knowing that God has called us to go, and that He is good, and that He has a plan.

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the LORD. 'Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you a hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11

Below are some other photos from our furlough thus far! I thought you might enjoy them. So, for all us Ringenbergs, relax and enjoy the ride!

Here's the boys at Tombstone:

And at Allison Ranch, Idaho:

Here's Ryan on our Aunt's horse in Illinois:

And here is a Pennsylvania version of the Wal-Mart parking lot, Amish style!:

Trusting God

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding.

In all your ways, acknowledge him and he shall direct your path."

Proverbs 3:5-6

Hi there, everyone! With us making plans for moving to Papua at the end of this year, my heart has been pondering what it means to"trust" the Lord. It takes a lot of trust for us to move from the known to the unknown. As I was exercising and praying one morning, I was asking God "What does it feel like to trust you?" These days when I exercise, it's usually walking up and down our driveway, which has a hill, as many times as I can, while the boys are playing outside in our yard. After walking, I went up to C.J., who was climbing the old "beringin" tree (at least that's what it's called in Indonesian). I believe it is a type of banyan tree. The funny thing about this tree is that it has roots that grow out of the branches and down toward the ground! If the roots hit the ground, they will form into another branch. It's the weirdest thing!

Anyway, C.J. was climbing up a bamboo pole that he had leaned against the trunk. "Come on, Mom, watch how I get down!" he shouted out cheerfully. Once he reached the top of his pole, he perched himself in the branches. Then, quick as lighting, he grabbed onto some roots from the tree and swung out from the security of its branches, promptly giving me a heart attack, and then lowered himself onto the bamboo pole again and shimmied down to the ground.

Suddenly it dawned on me that that's what trust looks like! Launching ourselves out from the security of where we've been; suspended, with all our weight hanging onto the "roots" of God, his Word and his promises; even enjoying the ride, and then lowering ourselves to the place He wants us to be. The whole time God was whispering this to me, Britt Nicole's song "Walk on the Water" was buzzing in my ears from my ipod, which talks about having the faith to step out and walk on the water. It happens to be playing now in the background as I write this post. Isn't God cool?

It still gives me butterflies in my stomach when I picture C.J. launching out from the tree, and sometimes I get butterflies when I think about living in a place like Papua. I am learning that even though I feel the fear, I can still choose to believe God. How about you? What are you learning from God lately?

We are planning on leaving Tarakan on June 1, and coming home to Nampa before we begin our furlough travels. We hope to see you soon!

The Cloud

You know, I am reminded at how God used clouds in the Old Testament, particularly to lead the children of Israel through the wilderness. When the cloud picked up and went, they went. Well, we've had a similar experience with a cloud!

Almost two years ago when we really, diligently started praying about going back overseas, I was a bit nervous, shall we say! So I decided I needed to know for myself from God if He was wanting us to go. I began praying without telling Dave what I was praying, just so I would know in my own heart if God was saying "go". Maybe because it would take a lot of courage for me to say "yes". So, several days after I began to truly seek the Lord on this issue (even asking God to show us where He wanted us to go if that was the case), Dave came home from flying and said he'd seen something weird.

Of course my curiosity was picqued so I asked him what he'd seen. "A cloud," was all he said, "and it was so strange that I wasn't even going to tell you." Now he really had me going. "Well, what was so weird about it?" I queried. "It was in the exact shape of Papua, Indonesia." My mouth dropped open because I know my husband. He is so detailed that if he said it was in the exact shape of Papua, it undoubtedly was. "It was right there in front of me," he ended.

I went to bed shocked. I didn't tell Dave yet what I'd been praying, but instead asked a couple of my friends what they thought about it. "Well, I think that was God!" Both of them ended up saying. "Yeah," I had to muse. "I guess I do too!"

So, I told God "Yes," and then I told my husband. And then we waited to see what God would do next! He'd answered us SO obviously that we thought He'd just make it happen! But, nothing. Absolute silence. "Hmmm," we thought, "I guess God is saying to wait." So, we figured we'd better wait on God's timing, but both of us accepted that God had shown us He would send us to Papua, Indonesia.

Imagine our surprise when later that fall we got an invitation from our old friend David Holsten to come to Kalimantan, Indonesia, where we had served almost 10 years ago! My first thought was, "Kalimantan? We're not supposed to go to Kalimantan!" But then God gently whispered to my heart, "Linda, this is a step along the way." Then I got excited, and then I got sad because I realized God was taking us back to the place where we had left quite a few memories of our daughter Hannah, who had since passed away. Then God said, "I'm taking you full-circle." Woah.

Next morning at women's Bible Study, the Beth Moore video was all about coming "full-circle." I leaned over to my friend Amy and said, "I'm going to Indonesia!" And cried. Well, now that we've been here it has been SUCH a blessing! God truly is taking us full-circle in our healing with Hannah.

So....imagine our surprise when, while we are here in Kalimantan, God started opening the doors for us to go to - you guessed it - Papua! God truly works in mysterious ways, and I'm so glad He knows what He's doing! All that to say that as of last Wednesday we have officially accepted a new assignment with MAF to the island of Papua, Indonesia. We are excited and a bit nervous as it means going through all our things in America and truly saying good-bye to our life there. I know it won't be easy, but I can honestly say that I am thoroughly enjoying the excitement of living a life on the edge with God. There's never a dull moment! (Except today because Ryan was sick so it slows me down a bit...)It is not an easy life, but it is fulfilling.

I do miss you, my friends, and long for a time where we can sit down and share! We plan on coming home in early June and being ready to travel to Papua around the end of the year. I love you all, and hope you are all well! Linda.

The Ride-Along

I have never in our history as an MAF couple gotten to go on a ridealong with my husband for a day of work (Mostly because we've always had young kids). This time when we came back to Tarakan, I told Dave that I wanted to go along with him sometime and get a first-hand glimpse of what he does every day. I've flown with him before when we've gone interior as a family. Our longest flight together was when we flew an MAF 206 all the way from East Kalimantan to West Kalimantan to have C.J. at a little mission hospital there. We actually crossed the equator on that one! Anyway, it has been totally crazy lately with Christmas activities, our school Christmas program, staff Christmas party, etc. So Dave said that it's only going to get busier for him when he starts training some people after the new year, so if I wanted to ridealong, we'd better do it! So, last Wednesday I had arranged a sitter for the boys, packed them a lunch, sent C.J. with a school check-list to complete, and dropped them off, then I took off to the MAF hangar.

Light drizzle rained down as I bounced down the muddy road to the hangar. After arriving, I had a little time because Dave was RTS'ing (Return to Service) the Caravan because it had been fixed the previous day for a minor problem. But, when he came back, the problem had not been fixed, so we had to wait while the mechanics made adjustments and then Dave would have to RTS it again. This is life in aviation - hurry up and wait! I was praying the problem would be fixed the second time or else that meant no flying that day because it would be too late. But praise the Lord, the problem was resolved and we could load up for the day. Better late than never!

It was fun to watch the passengers get loaded onto the airplane. We were taking them to a village called Long Ampung, which was an hour and twenty minute flight over the jungles of Borneo. I must admit, I do get a little freaked out when we first take off. I'm not fond of heights, and somehow the thought of how high we are above the water and the treetops can send me into a slight spurt of anxiety! But by the end of the day, it was normal because we had landed and taken off so many times! Dave introduced me to the passengers as the co-pilot, to which they all nodded approvingly. Yeah, right! Then he told them I was his wife, to which they laughed relievedly. He did this each time we got a new load of passengers. It was fun.

So, we flew through some clouds on the way to Long Ampung, to which one passenger responded by giving Dave dirty looks. Indonesians don't like flying and they get scared very easily, so flying through a bumpy cloud probably scared the tar out of her! This plane is equipped to be able to fly by instruments through the clouds. When we arrived in Long Ampung, we all deplaned and Dave took care of overseeing the unloading of the cargo and the reloading. I was approached by a young woman and man who were wearing headbands, and asked if I could take a letter for them back to tarakan. Then I learned that they were the sister and brother of a young man who had died recently. MAF flew this young man to Tarakan with a massive head injury from a motorcycle accident interior, and he had died in Tarakan. Then MAF had flown his body back to Long Ampung to be buried, and so we got to fly out his family and friends who had come home for the burial and funeral. Wow. That made it a bit more personal. We were assuming the headbands were a sign of mourning. When this young woman got out from the plane after we had flown her to Malinau, she broke down and hugged me and cried. It broke my heart, but yet by God's grace I was able to give her some comfort because of the comfort God had given us through Hannah's situation.

Next, from Malinau, we took a load of passengers (including a motorcycle) to Long Bawan, unloaded all that, turned around and flew a load back to Malinau, and were going to carry some empty fuel drums back to Tarakan to end our day when one of the men we had just flown seemed confused, and unsure of what he was going to do. Upon questioning him further, we found out he was the husband of a lady we'd heard about on the radio that morning who was pregnant and bleeding. She ended up taking a different airline to a place called Nunukan, so this man was trying to get to his wife in Nunukan. We found out she was eight months pregnant. So, after talking with Dave and our national workers in Malinau, the man decided to come along to Tarakan and try to get from there to Nunukan possibly the next morning. On the flight back home, Dave was talking on the radio to our base in Tarakan trying to see if we could get this guy a flight from Tarakan to Nunukan. Turns out everything was booked (MAF doesn't fly to Nunukan, so he was checking another airline), so he was going to see if he could possibly catch a boat instead the next day. Wow again. We were able to pray for him and his wife in our hearts on the way home and were glad to see when we arrived in Tarakan that he knew some of our national workers, and had family in Tarakan that could help him get to where he needed to go.

So, I got a little taste of a typical day for Dave. It's full of adventure, sometimes drama and sometimes trauma. But what a blessing to be used by God that day to give comfort and to help people get to where they need to be. Now I think he needs to come along on one of my work days! It's a different kind of adventure, as all you moms know! Love and miss you all! Linda (Sorry, I can't figure out how to delete the extra same picture, so here it is again!)

An Unexpected Passenger

The week before Hannah's birthday (October 27) Dave had an unexpected passenger. Just before preparing to take off in Long Bawan, a black and teal butterfly decided to meander into the cockpit. It perched next to the door, and Dave closed everything up for take-off. The butterfly calmly remained at its post for the hour flight from Long Bawan back to Tarakan, and as soon as Dave landed and opened the door again, the butterfly flew out, to the surprise of the MAF national workers in Tarakan. "Wah!" they cried, "ada penumpang!" (There's a passenger!) When Dave came home and told me the story, I teared up because it was so close to Hannah's birthday. How special of God to give Dave a special encounter with a butterfly.

The week before Hannah's birthday was really hard. I can never tell what kind of emotions I'm going to experience, but I felt that weight of grief on my heart. Perhaps because the last birthday she had on this earth was in Singapore, soon after we had evacuated Hannah from Tarakan for medical care. But the MAF team here is awesome. One friend gave me a note and a little tea set in memory of Hannah, another wrote me a card, and our long-time friends the Holstens gave us a plant in memory of Hannah. So all-in-all, we were well-loved, even though we're away from family right now. God is awesome to provide us with what we need, isn't He?

The day of Hannah's birthday, I decided to take off from school with the boys and go to the beach. My old friend Glady came too, along with two of her three children. I used to disciple Glady when we lived here years ago. She was one of my best friends. It has been fun to reunite with her, although we are both busy so we don't see each other as often as we'd like. So it was fun to reconnect and share Hannah's birthday together since she knew Hannah. The kids had a great time playing together and discovered some jellyfish that had washed up onto shore.

Homeschooling is going well, although I don't always feel like I know what I'm doing! But we have our good days and our bad days. It sure has been busy lately! You can pray for the whole team here as there is so much work to do and so much going on. Pray that we all can keep Jesus as our first love during the busyness, and seek to follow His plan each day. I love and miss you all! Linda

The One Day War

Hi there everyone! That's right, we had a one day war here on the tiny, jungly island of Tarakan. It's probably the first of it's kind that Tarakan has seen since World War II when the Japanese occuppied the island. Its scale was not nearly as large as that war, but it did succeed in pretty well shutting down the town for several days.

Two weeks ago we heard rumors that there were going to be riots in downtown Tarakan. Apparently a Tidung (pronounced tee-dung) man and his son were killed by a Bugis (boo-geese) man and the Tidung people were calling for an ethnic war against the Bugis people. Fighting of this kind that pits tribe against tribe can unfortunately be common here in Indonesia where there are many thousands of tribes that make up the people of this unique island-filled country. The Bugis people used to be sea-faring pirates many years ago, and actually, the word "boogie man" comes from this tough people group. Most all of the Tidung and Bugis people are Muslim.

Well, on Tuesday night the police gave everyone a 5:00 curfew, and that night Dave and I could hear the rioters from up here on the hill. We, nor any of the other MAF families, felt in danger because we live far enough away and are not targeted, but it was still eerie to hear the chants of the angry Tidung people yelling. Then we heard gunshots. This went on for a while, the chanting, then gun shots from the police to try and break up the crowd. Then we could see an orange glow where the crowd had lit a building on fire! Although we didn't feel in danger, that was one night we were glad to be home. The boys slept through it all.

So the town was shut down for several days with many people leaving the island or fleeing from their homes. I had to borrow diapers and bread from a friend! But other than that we had plenty of food to get by. The worst part about it for me was being stuck at home! I like to get out at least once a day. But thankfully that didn't last too long. It was weird, though, driving around and seeing the soldiers that the government sent it, with their automatic weapons, around town. My friend Rebecca Hopkins took the picture in the beginning of the blog of some soldiers in front of our one fast food restaurant in town, KFC! (Indonesians LOVE fried chicken!) Ryan likes to look at the soldiers whenever we drive by them.

And, funny enough, it was Ryan who noticed the bullet holes in the second level of the mall. There are 13 (the boys and I counted) bullet holes in the glass. I never would have noticed them if not for my observant son.

All that to say that we could use your prayers here in Tarakan because there are rumors that after the soldiers pull out of town on Thursday, October 14, that the fighting may start again. Please pray for the peace of Tarakan. And for the salvation of the Tidung and Bugis people.

Love and miss you all! Linda

Busy, Busy, Busy!

Wow, time does fly! I apologize for not writing sooner. I must admit, when things get busy, the computer is the first thing to go! (Those of you who know me well know this...) But I will try to post updates every two weeks or so. With homeschooling going on, there's just a lot to think about. It's been going okay - we definitely have our good days and hard days and trying to balance keeping Ryan occuppied at the same time is challenging. That kid would tear the whole school apart if he could!
Speaking of Ryan, tomorrow is his birthday! He will be 4 years old. It seems like he's been around a lot longer than that. But I can't even remember our life without him. Sometimes C.J. wishes to be without him! Ryan can be a little rough at times, so we have to work through C.J.'s hurt feelings a lot. Those are our struggles.
Well, things are just plain busy around here lately! We have homeschooling four days a week and our co-op on Friday. I am teaching art for co-op, which has been really fun! I like it a lot. My friends are teaching P.E., Geography, Science, and Indonesian. So Friday's are a packed morning. Ryan gets to go to pre-school, too, which two other moms are teaching at one of their houses. It is fun to have something structured with the kids' friends as a part of their school experience here.
This past weekend was our first annual MAF ladies Retreat here in Tarakan. It was a one-night retreat at the local Swiss-Belhotel (which was really nice!). It was so nice to get together with all of the ladies here and have some fun, listen to Beth Moore teach on Loving Well, sing some songs and just relax. I am so privileged to be here to be a part of it.
We just welcomed a new couple to the program here, Chris and Sarah Desjardan (I can never remember how to spell their last name). They are in the process of getting settled into their new house, and then on Friday we will welcome another family coming back from furlough and moving to Tarakan. They were previously in Southern Kalimantan. So things will be busy with a welcome dinner for these two new families, plus Ryan's birthday party next Saturday.
Well, I sure miss you all of my friends! You can pray for me to be intentional about making time to spend with the Lord. I am feeling like I need to do this more, but it's just tough with everything that's going on! Let me know how you all are doing... Love ya, Linda

Lessons from a Turtle

The following is a story that happened to us a week ago with C.J.'s turtle "Tortilla" (Tor-til-a) (A combination of tortoise and tortilla!) Oh, and a big praise that our school books came in this week! Thanks for all who were praying for that!

The sermon really touched my heart that Sunday - what I could understand of it. The pastor talked pretty fast, and since it was in Indonesian, I could pick up about half of what he said. But one thing I got as he read the parables of Jesus from Luke 15: God's heart is broken over sin and for the lost. He longs for them to repent and return to Him, like the Prodigal son.

It was such a good reminder. You would think that serving overseas like we do, the lost would always be our chief concern, but having children, being involved in a technical ministry, and sometimes just growing preoccuppied with the things of our own life, sometimes I can just plain forget about the lost. Can you relate?

Since it was such a stirring reminder, that next morning, I read our boys the parable of the prodigal son from Luke 15 so they could understand the pastor's message. Then we prayed and asked God to give us hearts like His.

Later that mornign, I asked C.J. to take his turtle outside to get some sun. I got busy doing other things and so did C.J. We can both get distracted rather easily. About a half-hour later I asked, "Where's Tortilla?" "I dont' know," was C.J.'s reply.

"What do you mean you don't know? Weren't you keeping an eye on her?"

"She was right over there." He pointed to a place in the grass no longer occuppied by the turtle. Frustration brewed up in me. I had to run an errand and I didn't have time to look for a turtle!

Distraught, C.J. meandered around the yard, poking in corners and looking under coverings of dried-up bamboo leaves - but no Tortilla. Soon, he gave up and I found him sobbing in his room. "I've failed Tortilla!" he sobbed. "I lost her."

As I tried to negotiate the line between my parental irritation at his negligence, my disbelief that such a slow creature could completely disappear from our yard, and my frustration at needing to be somewhere else, my heart was touched by C.J.'s absolute brokenness over his lost turtle. I felt the Lord whisper, "Just stay with him for a while." After asking internally for God's direction, I urged C.J. to not be too hard on himself, but to call his friend who knew a lot about turtles, and ask him if he had any advice about where to look, and to pray that he could find Tortilla.

While C.J. was doing that, I grabbed a flashlight and decided to try my luck (even though it's not luck) at looking underneath the house. Logically, it's the only place she could have gotten to in the amount of time that C.J. had left her on the grass. I headed down the cement steps that went to the carport below the house. From there I could shine the light into the dark crevace taht was underneath the house. And there, sure enough, though I only swher because she stuck her head out, was Tortilla, the now naughty turtle who had run away.

"C.J.!" I cried excitedly, loud enough so he would hear me from the house, "I found her!" C.J. tore out of the house and down the stiars - smiling from ear to ear. We rejoiced together. It was only then that our prayer from that morning rushed back into my mind. "C.J.," I said thoughtfully, "I think God just gave us an object lesson so we could experience how it feels for him to miss the lost like in those parables of Jesus."

"C.J. thought for a moment. "Maybe so, Mom."

"Are you glad to have your turtle back?"

"Oh, yeah!"

Once Tortilla was returned to her cage, we had a new appreciation for the silly creature, and a gentle reminder from the Lord about his love for the lost.

Hannah's Anniversary

Hey there everyone! Thank you SO much for all of your prayers and thoughts on Hannah's anniversary. I just know it makes a huge difference in our ability to make it through the hard things and even find joy in them to by thinking about the future that all of us who follow Jesus have in heaven! I think it just feels good to make it through August 2 - especially this year being here in Indonesia.

It was a busy weekend because we celebrated Dave's birthday on Saturday, and then Hannah's anniversary on Sunday. I think having things planned really helps because it gives us a sense of "control" in some ways that we're not completely at the whim of the day. After praying about it, we decided to ask our friends the Holstens if they wanted to come over and celebrate Hannah's anniversary with us. David and Natalie were here back when we were here before (back in the day!) and have been serving here ever since. So they knew Hannah, and their son Carter was a good friend with Hannah. Now they have four children (Carter, Grace, Luke and Zoe).

David and Natalie brought over some pictures of Hannah that they had from back around 2001 or so. It was neat to see them, and to talk and share about our memories. We remembered how Hannah and Carter used to play "brother and sister", and how Hannah became very interested in amphibians because Carter was. I am amazed sometimes at how many things I have forgotten. So it was special to remember together. Dave and I were reminiscing how Hannah used to not want to kiss him goodbye in the mornings so she would run and hide in the rolled up tikar (bamboo mat), right in the middle of it! Funny.

After sharing memories, the kids colored pictures in honor of Hannah (we ended up with a lot of butterflies) and then we went outside and released balloons together. I love doing that on her anniversary. It's so simple, yet there's something very symbolic about letting the balloon go and watching it go up to heaven. Dave reminded us that all of us who are in Christ will get to be together again someday. Some days I can live in that as a reality, and other days I find myself dwelling in my sadness. I know I'm only human. I do ask God to increase my faith so that I can live more days walking as if it were reality that I will see Hannah again. Not that I don't need to be sad - I think it's a fine line to balance our grief and be honest about it, but temper it with the hope that we have in Christ. For when I am really believing that this life isn't all there is, I find I am much more full of joy and confidence in the Lord.

One other thing I enjoyed doing was going down to MAF on her actual anniversary and sitting in the airplane that's dedicated to Hannah. (see picture above) It is special to me to have something that actually represents her here. I wondered how many stories have taken place in that airplane and how many people have been helped by it. It was special to have a tangible place to go to and something to touch that represents her here in Indonesia.

So, be encouraged everyone! This life isn't the end - someday we will get to be with our King, the Lord Jesus. But until then, I am so thankful for all of you and your prayers and your friendship. God bless you.

Stuck in the Mud

Yes, yesterday I went out to go shopping - just to get a few things at the store, and I got stuck in the mud at the top of our hill. There are these two little tracks of cement that the car has to stay on, and I accidentally went off, and since it's been raining so much lately I got stuck in the mud. Forty five minutes later with the help of my friend Katie and an Indonesian neighbor, we finally got the car out of the mud. When Dave got home for lunch, he could see the remains of several tears and said, "What's wrong?" I told him about my adventure, and how I hadn't been able to accomplish what I wanted to do. He said, "IWA." I said, "What in the world does IWA mean?" He said, "Indonesia Wins Again!" (Our friends the Holstens have coined this term!)
Now, on its own, although frustrating, that one event may not have brought me to tears, but after the last several days of "reality" hitting about living in Indonesia, it did. Reality in the form of: pretty constant rain for the last week (that means constant clouds, and you all know how much I love clouds!), the LPG(gas) running out for the stove while I was preparing dinner for guests, training a new househelper, the boys getting eaten up by mosquitos, mosques that go off and echo inside your brain because it's so loud(5 times a day, starting at 4:30 am). Anyway, you get the picture.
The first three weeks of being here have been wonderful at times, and very frustrating at other times. God is definitely teaching us a lesson in dependence upon Him, and also in changing our expectations. The reason we get so frustrated when things go wrong is because we're not expecting them to. Pretty much in America things work (internet, electricity, your oven, the hot water...) Well, that may not always be the case here. So, I must admit, yesterday, being stuck in the mud just capped my experience of being slightly depressed. I really feel like God is teaching me to be honest when things are frustrating, but to trust Him to take care of me, and to provide for my needs. And, if things don't work out like I want them to, to have faith that He is in control and has a good reason.
One good thing that came from being stuck in the mud was I got to meet our Indonesian neighbor, who helped me. I was so grateful that she would be willing to get dirty and come and help me. So I decided to take her a gift of rambutan (That's an Indonesian fruit that looks like it has hair on it- rambut means hair). Indonesians love to give and receive gifts. So, you can pray for more opportunities to visit with her.
When I get discouraged about the hard things of living here in Indonesia, I think about two weeks ago when I got to sit next to a friend in church, and see her for the first time. I will call her Mary, though that is not her real name. Mary grew up Muslim, and accepted Christ about a year ago or so. God gave me the privilege of talking to her when we lived here before. She and her Canadian husband lived next door. She told me about having dreams about Jesus, and we got to pray together as she was definitely seeking. So imagine my joy to get to sit next to her in church and call her "sister!" That has been one of the most exciting things of all so far! She has been ostricized from her family, yet her faith persists. Sitting next to her I had new appreciation for the blood of Jesus and what we are saved from. Praise God!
Hannah's anniversary is coming up (number 7) of her homegoing to heaven. It is August 2. We have been praying and thinking of how to spend that day. My heart has been heavier lately and I think part of it is the anticipation of that day and all of the emotions it brings. You can pray that God would give is strength and blessing on that day.
PRAYER POINTS: Pray for our attitudes as we encounter difficulties here. And for fortitude on Hannah's anniversary and the days leading up to it, and for much fruit to come from her life and memory. Thank you! We are so grateful for all of you!

We Made It!

Wow, thanks for all of your prayers! We made it to Tarakan, Indonesia. For the whole journey we could feel your prayers! The Lord gave us all such a peace and a calmness. The boys did GREAT! We are convinced they are world-travelers-in-training. Even Ryan did well. To the right is a picture of Mary Epp, Annette Welburn and I. The Epps and Welburns came to the airport to see us off. It was so nice to be sent off by them! Below is a picture of Dave and Reg Epp.






The hardest part of the journey was when we arrived in Jakarta. We had to collect our bags, get them through customs, and then transfer to the domestic terminal via a shuttle. All of this, done in Indonesia, is a bit crazy! The domestic terminal was packed, and hot, and it didn't help that I forgot to set my watch one hour back, so I thought our flight was going to leave any moment! Once we got that figured out, and our bags checked in, we began the hot process of waiting for our flight.

Once we got on there, we were all out for the count. I couldn't even keep my eyes open! And C.J. was out, even though he was being oogled and ogled by the passenger across the aisle!

The boys enjoyed making some friends on the trip. To the right is a picture of them and a friend we made in San Francisco, who traveled with us to Taiwan. The picture is in the waiting room in the airport at Taipei, Taiwan. She was going to Vietnam to visit family. Below, is Ryan enjoying talking on the phone, or pretending he is on the flight from Taipei to Jakarta.

But, it's good to be here in Tarakan. The team here is young and energetic. (I've already been referred to as an "old-timer"), and they've given us a warm welcome. It's been great to see our friends the Holstens again. They were arrived in Tarakan when we were here before, and now David is the program manager. His wife Natalie has been taking me out shopping. I tell you, coming from Idaho, it's quite a change! The driving is chaotic, you get stared at wherever you go, and people call you "bule" (boo-lay), which means foreigner. But we've already gotten to see some old friends from before. I guess eight years is a long time.

The strangest part of the journey for me was when we were flying over the jungles of Borneo, on our way to Jakarta. Just seeing the broccoli-like terrain below brought me right back to flying with Dave in the MAF 206 over scenery just like that, and I thought, "I can't believe we're back!" I've had many "weird" moments since then, when things all of a sudden became crystal clear and I had a memory. The sweetest and most heart-wrenching one happened this morning when my friend Joy picked me up and brought me to her house, which is the house we used to live in. Although it's changed since we've lived there, one memory was crystal clear. The corner in the kitchen was where we had Hannah's little table that she would sit at for hours and make crafts, color and staple things. (She loved her stapler!) Just seeing that corner brought back so many memories! That corner represents to me who Hannah is. (I say is because I'm pretty sure she's still got the same personality in heaven). She's creative and artistic and knows what she's about.

Dave got his old motorcycle back to ride, so here is a picture of he and the boys in our front yard. We love and miss all of you and look forward to hearing from you!

PRAYER POINTS: Thanks again for your prayers! Please continue to pray for us as we settle in to a new country, climate and team. and pray for Dave as he has already begun his check-out in the Caravan. There are a lot of things to learn.

We're Leaving on Saturday!

Thanks so much for praying! We finally got the final approval on our visas and MAF has purchased tickets for us for...gulp...this Saturday! We'll fly out of Boise in the late afternoon to San Francisco, where we have a layover until 1:35 in the morning when we board our China Air flight to Taipei. From there it's on to Jakarta, and then on to Tarakan. We covet your prayers for the trip, especially with Ryan. I'm sure C.J. will do just fine, but Ryan gets a little testy when he's tired!

It's very exciting, and things are very busy. We're busy shopping for last minute supplies, and packing them all up. It should be quite a production. But, as God has promised us, He is striding ahead of us, and is with us. The coolest thing happened this morning - a total God thing. I just happened to pick up the verse that I was talking about in my last post, Deuteronomy 31:6, and we read it from the 3x5 card this morning as a family. Then, later on during the day, we were listening to Air 1 the radio station, and they read the same verse! It was their verse of the day. Then, I was talking to a good friend on the phone today and telling her about it and she said, "No way! God led me to that verse this morning!" I had goosebumps. I just love it it when God does that! I love it when He's so clear because it really reminds me that He's real.

Well, I'm beat so I'm going to sign off with that update. Thanks so much for everyone's prayers! I may not write again until we get settled in in Indonesia. At least until we figure out how to connect to the internet!

PRAYER POINTS: Praise God for the final visas coming in! Please pray for our trip on Saturday to go well, and for patience and protection for our family. Thank you!

Your God is striding ahead of you

As I sit here writing at ten o'clock tonight, the Idaho sky is just turning toward twilight, with a rim of orange on the horizon, fading into the smoky blue of the sky. It will be so weird to go from the Pacific Northwest, where it's light so late to the tropics so close to the equator that it gets light around 6 am and dark around 6pm. But when it's as hot as it is in Tarakan, you don't mind nighttime coming! At least we'll get to experience the longest day of the year in Idaho before we go. We are still waiting on our visas. We were accepted through the Indonesian Department of labor, but still getting pushed through the other departments. So, it should be within the next two weeks that we actually receive them, and then will be able to purchase tickets and set a departure date. So you can keep praying about that.

This past week was eventful. Dave was in Wichita, Kansas for Caravan training (the type of airplane he'll be flying in Indonesia). So the boys and I were on our own. We always miss Dave when he's gone. Nobody roughs up the boys like Papa. And Mama is usually ready for a break by the time he gets back! Praise the Lord, he had a good time of training, and really enjoyed his simulator instructor. It sure was a lot of information to pack in, though! I think he's glad to be home, too.

While he was gone, MAF had their annual family conference. That kept us busy from Wednesday evening on. The speaker this year was Dr. Charles Shepson, the father of Dave's co-worker Brian Shepson. Dr. Shepson is almost 82, but he's as spunky as ever. He has been a pastor and counselor for many years, and has published multiple books as well. He's a great story-teller and loves to recount story after story of God's faithfulness in his life. If you like stories you might like his books Quiet Miracles I and II, and soon to be III!

I did feel like God spoke to my heart on the last evening. (All of his messages were good - but this one stuck the most for me). He was speaking from Deuteronomy, and his last message was from Deuteronomy 31. It seems like this past year of Bible Study has all ended up centering on entering the promised land. So I don't think it was a coincidence that Dr. Shepson's messages also focused on Moses' charge to Joshua and the people of Israel as they prepared to enter the promised land. He was reading from the message from Deuteronomy 31: 6: "Be strong. Take courage. Don't be intimidated. Don't give them a second thought because God, your God, is striding ahead of you. He's right there with you. He won't let you down; He won't leave you." Wow. His first two points were that God strides ahead of us into the land, and that God is also right there with us, and he told story after story to illustrate these points.

Well, I felt like God was speaking to my heart, specifically about going back to Indonesia. What comfort to truly believe that God is striding ahead of us, and that He is right there with us through anything! How encouraging. And He does that for all of us!

Awhile back I mentioned that I had found some pictures of C.J. and Hannah from Indonesia. As I think about God striding ahead of us to go back to that land, I thought I'd share one of those pictures with you, although I can't figure out how to put it down here rather than up top! Sorry, I'm still learning this blog thing.

PRAYER POINTS: For God to work out the departure date that He wants for our family, and for wisdom to know how to organize our time to continue accomplishing all the tasks that need to be finished. Thank you!

I am so sick of rain! I have decided that we now live in Ida-gon instead of Idaho. HA. I suppose I need to be thankful for it, and I am thankful for the water. But a little sun would be okay too! I do thank God for strength lately to not be too depressed with all the gray skies and all of the tasks to get ready for Indonesia, which can seem overwhelming. I go back and forth from being overwhelmed to being really excited. I am definitely missing Bible Study, but enjoying reading a couple of books, which I don't make time to do when I am in Bible Study. I would highly recommend them. One is "His Princess, Love Letters from your King" by Sheri Rose Shepherd, which is written like daily letters from God, based on Scripture. For anyone who is really touched by written letters, it seems to take God's truths and put them in a format that speaks to the heart. My friend also gave me the book "Crazy Love" by Francis Chan. It's really good, too. I'm not too far into that yet. The Word God seems to be speaking to me lately is to "come away and get some rest" (Mark 6:31, my paraphrase). I think that's important, with everything there is to do. I can feel myself focusing on all the details, so I have to remember to just stop sometimes and be with my King. I am also really enjoying Kari Jobe's Album, called Kari Jobe, I think. She's got some awesome worship stuff on there!
Well, as for the practical stuff, I'm in the throes of ordering homeschool curriculum for C.J.. Never thought I'd be doing that, but I'm kind of excited to give it a try. It's a little overwhelming since I've never done it before. We have some great resources here in Idaho, so I've been talking to several friends and getting advice. Hopefully I can have that ordered today. We still don't have a final date to go, but it should be the end of June. Hopefully we can order tickets soon.
PRAYER POINTS: Thanks so much everyone who is praying! Please pray for wisdom for the homeschool curriculum, and pray for Dave as he is going to Kansas soon for a week of Caravan training. Thank you!

Praise the Lord, we just got word today that we have been recommended for our visas! So that means that we'll have a departure date set soon! So thanks for praying! We are excited. I'm nervous, though, because that begins to put finality to all of the things that have yet to be done! I'm not very good at prioritizing. So I need the Lord's strength.
It also brings finality to the emotional aspect of things. I was looking at pictures today on the computer and found some of C.J. and Hannah in Indonesia. It made me realize what a heart connection there is to that place, and kind of slapped me in the face with it. It's going to be hard to go back. But, I am trusting, very healing as well. Well, it's late so I'm going to sign off for now.

As we prepare to go back to Indonesia, God has brought Psalm 46:10 to my attention several times this past week, the last time being this morning. Okay, Lord, are you trying to tell me something? Psalm 46:10 says, "Be still and know that I am God." I have such a hard time being still. Do you? Please tell me I'm not alone. I would much rather be in motion than be still. It's scary. I think I feel like if I'm actually still, either God or myself is going to discover something about me that I don't want to be discovered. Being still means to stop and pay attention to what's going on on the inside. It also means facing whatever's going on on the inside and coming in vulnerability to stand before the Lord. I think that's the hard part! I don't know about you, but being vulnerable is hard for me.
But being still isn't the end of it. The Lord also wants us to know that He is God. To let His truth soak into our being. To believe He is who he says He is. To accept His love for us. To acknowledge who He is. To rest in Him and in His love for us. To just let him be God. Anyway, that's what He's been speaking to me these past few days. It's so busy with details getting ready to go. I don't like details! But I know it will be worth it.
Ryan and I joined Dave at MAF's chapel on Wednesday morning to hear the team that went to Kalimantan to help with VBS for their Family Conference. They each shared and showed pictures and it was neat. It brought up a lot of emotion seeing pictures of Tarakan and telling Ryan, "That's where we're going!" and "Those kids are going to be your new friends!" So I've been a bit sad lately too as it really hits home that we're leaving friends here and going back to face our memories of Tarakan and Hannah's life there. But I was reminded in the video from Bible Study (We've been catching the end of Beth Moore's Fruit of the Spirit study) that on the other side of the pain God allows us to go through is a promise. I want to hold on for the promise!
PRAYER POINTS: You can pray for our visas to come through. All of MAF's visas in Indonesia have been put on hold. We would like to leave June 23, but we need God to release our visas. Thank you!