The Cloud

You know, I am reminded at how God used clouds in the Old Testament, particularly to lead the children of Israel through the wilderness. When the cloud picked up and went, they went. Well, we've had a similar experience with a cloud!

Almost two years ago when we really, diligently started praying about going back overseas, I was a bit nervous, shall we say! So I decided I needed to know for myself from God if He was wanting us to go. I began praying without telling Dave what I was praying, just so I would know in my own heart if God was saying "go". Maybe because it would take a lot of courage for me to say "yes". So, several days after I began to truly seek the Lord on this issue (even asking God to show us where He wanted us to go if that was the case), Dave came home from flying and said he'd seen something weird.

Of course my curiosity was picqued so I asked him what he'd seen. "A cloud," was all he said, "and it was so strange that I wasn't even going to tell you." Now he really had me going. "Well, what was so weird about it?" I queried. "It was in the exact shape of Papua, Indonesia." My mouth dropped open because I know my husband. He is so detailed that if he said it was in the exact shape of Papua, it undoubtedly was. "It was right there in front of me," he ended.

I went to bed shocked. I didn't tell Dave yet what I'd been praying, but instead asked a couple of my friends what they thought about it. "Well, I think that was God!" Both of them ended up saying. "Yeah," I had to muse. "I guess I do too!"

So, I told God "Yes," and then I told my husband. And then we waited to see what God would do next! He'd answered us SO obviously that we thought He'd just make it happen! But, nothing. Absolute silence. "Hmmm," we thought, "I guess God is saying to wait." So, we figured we'd better wait on God's timing, but both of us accepted that God had shown us He would send us to Papua, Indonesia.

Imagine our surprise when later that fall we got an invitation from our old friend David Holsten to come to Kalimantan, Indonesia, where we had served almost 10 years ago! My first thought was, "Kalimantan? We're not supposed to go to Kalimantan!" But then God gently whispered to my heart, "Linda, this is a step along the way." Then I got excited, and then I got sad because I realized God was taking us back to the place where we had left quite a few memories of our daughter Hannah, who had since passed away. Then God said, "I'm taking you full-circle." Woah.

Next morning at women's Bible Study, the Beth Moore video was all about coming "full-circle." I leaned over to my friend Amy and said, "I'm going to Indonesia!" And cried. Well, now that we've been here it has been SUCH a blessing! God truly is taking us full-circle in our healing with Hannah.

So....imagine our surprise when, while we are here in Kalimantan, God started opening the doors for us to go to - you guessed it - Papua! God truly works in mysterious ways, and I'm so glad He knows what He's doing! All that to say that as of last Wednesday we have officially accepted a new assignment with MAF to the island of Papua, Indonesia. We are excited and a bit nervous as it means going through all our things in America and truly saying good-bye to our life there. I know it won't be easy, but I can honestly say that I am thoroughly enjoying the excitement of living a life on the edge with God. There's never a dull moment! (Except today because Ryan was sick so it slows me down a bit...)It is not an easy life, but it is fulfilling.

I do miss you, my friends, and long for a time where we can sit down and share! We plan on coming home in early June and being ready to travel to Papua around the end of the year. I love you all, and hope you are all well! Linda.

The Ride-Along

I have never in our history as an MAF couple gotten to go on a ridealong with my husband for a day of work (Mostly because we've always had young kids). This time when we came back to Tarakan, I told Dave that I wanted to go along with him sometime and get a first-hand glimpse of what he does every day. I've flown with him before when we've gone interior as a family. Our longest flight together was when we flew an MAF 206 all the way from East Kalimantan to West Kalimantan to have C.J. at a little mission hospital there. We actually crossed the equator on that one! Anyway, it has been totally crazy lately with Christmas activities, our school Christmas program, staff Christmas party, etc. So Dave said that it's only going to get busier for him when he starts training some people after the new year, so if I wanted to ridealong, we'd better do it! So, last Wednesday I had arranged a sitter for the boys, packed them a lunch, sent C.J. with a school check-list to complete, and dropped them off, then I took off to the MAF hangar.

Light drizzle rained down as I bounced down the muddy road to the hangar. After arriving, I had a little time because Dave was RTS'ing (Return to Service) the Caravan because it had been fixed the previous day for a minor problem. But, when he came back, the problem had not been fixed, so we had to wait while the mechanics made adjustments and then Dave would have to RTS it again. This is life in aviation - hurry up and wait! I was praying the problem would be fixed the second time or else that meant no flying that day because it would be too late. But praise the Lord, the problem was resolved and we could load up for the day. Better late than never!

It was fun to watch the passengers get loaded onto the airplane. We were taking them to a village called Long Ampung, which was an hour and twenty minute flight over the jungles of Borneo. I must admit, I do get a little freaked out when we first take off. I'm not fond of heights, and somehow the thought of how high we are above the water and the treetops can send me into a slight spurt of anxiety! But by the end of the day, it was normal because we had landed and taken off so many times! Dave introduced me to the passengers as the co-pilot, to which they all nodded approvingly. Yeah, right! Then he told them I was his wife, to which they laughed relievedly. He did this each time we got a new load of passengers. It was fun.

So, we flew through some clouds on the way to Long Ampung, to which one passenger responded by giving Dave dirty looks. Indonesians don't like flying and they get scared very easily, so flying through a bumpy cloud probably scared the tar out of her! This plane is equipped to be able to fly by instruments through the clouds. When we arrived in Long Ampung, we all deplaned and Dave took care of overseeing the unloading of the cargo and the reloading. I was approached by a young woman and man who were wearing headbands, and asked if I could take a letter for them back to tarakan. Then I learned that they were the sister and brother of a young man who had died recently. MAF flew this young man to Tarakan with a massive head injury from a motorcycle accident interior, and he had died in Tarakan. Then MAF had flown his body back to Long Ampung to be buried, and so we got to fly out his family and friends who had come home for the burial and funeral. Wow. That made it a bit more personal. We were assuming the headbands were a sign of mourning. When this young woman got out from the plane after we had flown her to Malinau, she broke down and hugged me and cried. It broke my heart, but yet by God's grace I was able to give her some comfort because of the comfort God had given us through Hannah's situation.

Next, from Malinau, we took a load of passengers (including a motorcycle) to Long Bawan, unloaded all that, turned around and flew a load back to Malinau, and were going to carry some empty fuel drums back to Tarakan to end our day when one of the men we had just flown seemed confused, and unsure of what he was going to do. Upon questioning him further, we found out he was the husband of a lady we'd heard about on the radio that morning who was pregnant and bleeding. She ended up taking a different airline to a place called Nunukan, so this man was trying to get to his wife in Nunukan. We found out she was eight months pregnant. So, after talking with Dave and our national workers in Malinau, the man decided to come along to Tarakan and try to get from there to Nunukan possibly the next morning. On the flight back home, Dave was talking on the radio to our base in Tarakan trying to see if we could get this guy a flight from Tarakan to Nunukan. Turns out everything was booked (MAF doesn't fly to Nunukan, so he was checking another airline), so he was going to see if he could possibly catch a boat instead the next day. Wow again. We were able to pray for him and his wife in our hearts on the way home and were glad to see when we arrived in Tarakan that he knew some of our national workers, and had family in Tarakan that could help him get to where he needed to go.

So, I got a little taste of a typical day for Dave. It's full of adventure, sometimes drama and sometimes trauma. But what a blessing to be used by God that day to give comfort and to help people get to where they need to be. Now I think he needs to come along on one of my work days! It's a different kind of adventure, as all you moms know! Love and miss you all! Linda (Sorry, I can't figure out how to delete the extra same picture, so here it is again!)

An Unexpected Passenger

The week before Hannah's birthday (October 27) Dave had an unexpected passenger. Just before preparing to take off in Long Bawan, a black and teal butterfly decided to meander into the cockpit. It perched next to the door, and Dave closed everything up for take-off. The butterfly calmly remained at its post for the hour flight from Long Bawan back to Tarakan, and as soon as Dave landed and opened the door again, the butterfly flew out, to the surprise of the MAF national workers in Tarakan. "Wah!" they cried, "ada penumpang!" (There's a passenger!) When Dave came home and told me the story, I teared up because it was so close to Hannah's birthday. How special of God to give Dave a special encounter with a butterfly.

The week before Hannah's birthday was really hard. I can never tell what kind of emotions I'm going to experience, but I felt that weight of grief on my heart. Perhaps because the last birthday she had on this earth was in Singapore, soon after we had evacuated Hannah from Tarakan for medical care. But the MAF team here is awesome. One friend gave me a note and a little tea set in memory of Hannah, another wrote me a card, and our long-time friends the Holstens gave us a plant in memory of Hannah. So all-in-all, we were well-loved, even though we're away from family right now. God is awesome to provide us with what we need, isn't He?

The day of Hannah's birthday, I decided to take off from school with the boys and go to the beach. My old friend Glady came too, along with two of her three children. I used to disciple Glady when we lived here years ago. She was one of my best friends. It has been fun to reunite with her, although we are both busy so we don't see each other as often as we'd like. So it was fun to reconnect and share Hannah's birthday together since she knew Hannah. The kids had a great time playing together and discovered some jellyfish that had washed up onto shore.

Homeschooling is going well, although I don't always feel like I know what I'm doing! But we have our good days and our bad days. It sure has been busy lately! You can pray for the whole team here as there is so much work to do and so much going on. Pray that we all can keep Jesus as our first love during the busyness, and seek to follow His plan each day. I love and miss you all! Linda

The One Day War

Hi there everyone! That's right, we had a one day war here on the tiny, jungly island of Tarakan. It's probably the first of it's kind that Tarakan has seen since World War II when the Japanese occuppied the island. Its scale was not nearly as large as that war, but it did succeed in pretty well shutting down the town for several days.

Two weeks ago we heard rumors that there were going to be riots in downtown Tarakan. Apparently a Tidung (pronounced tee-dung) man and his son were killed by a Bugis (boo-geese) man and the Tidung people were calling for an ethnic war against the Bugis people. Fighting of this kind that pits tribe against tribe can unfortunately be common here in Indonesia where there are many thousands of tribes that make up the people of this unique island-filled country. The Bugis people used to be sea-faring pirates many years ago, and actually, the word "boogie man" comes from this tough people group. Most all of the Tidung and Bugis people are Muslim.

Well, on Tuesday night the police gave everyone a 5:00 curfew, and that night Dave and I could hear the rioters from up here on the hill. We, nor any of the other MAF families, felt in danger because we live far enough away and are not targeted, but it was still eerie to hear the chants of the angry Tidung people yelling. Then we heard gunshots. This went on for a while, the chanting, then gun shots from the police to try and break up the crowd. Then we could see an orange glow where the crowd had lit a building on fire! Although we didn't feel in danger, that was one night we were glad to be home. The boys slept through it all.

So the town was shut down for several days with many people leaving the island or fleeing from their homes. I had to borrow diapers and bread from a friend! But other than that we had plenty of food to get by. The worst part about it for me was being stuck at home! I like to get out at least once a day. But thankfully that didn't last too long. It was weird, though, driving around and seeing the soldiers that the government sent it, with their automatic weapons, around town. My friend Rebecca Hopkins took the picture in the beginning of the blog of some soldiers in front of our one fast food restaurant in town, KFC! (Indonesians LOVE fried chicken!) Ryan likes to look at the soldiers whenever we drive by them.

And, funny enough, it was Ryan who noticed the bullet holes in the second level of the mall. There are 13 (the boys and I counted) bullet holes in the glass. I never would have noticed them if not for my observant son.

All that to say that we could use your prayers here in Tarakan because there are rumors that after the soldiers pull out of town on Thursday, October 14, that the fighting may start again. Please pray for the peace of Tarakan. And for the salvation of the Tidung and Bugis people.

Love and miss you all! Linda

Busy, Busy, Busy!

Wow, time does fly! I apologize for not writing sooner. I must admit, when things get busy, the computer is the first thing to go! (Those of you who know me well know this...) But I will try to post updates every two weeks or so. With homeschooling going on, there's just a lot to think about. It's been going okay - we definitely have our good days and hard days and trying to balance keeping Ryan occuppied at the same time is challenging. That kid would tear the whole school apart if he could!
Speaking of Ryan, tomorrow is his birthday! He will be 4 years old. It seems like he's been around a lot longer than that. But I can't even remember our life without him. Sometimes C.J. wishes to be without him! Ryan can be a little rough at times, so we have to work through C.J.'s hurt feelings a lot. Those are our struggles.
Well, things are just plain busy around here lately! We have homeschooling four days a week and our co-op on Friday. I am teaching art for co-op, which has been really fun! I like it a lot. My friends are teaching P.E., Geography, Science, and Indonesian. So Friday's are a packed morning. Ryan gets to go to pre-school, too, which two other moms are teaching at one of their houses. It is fun to have something structured with the kids' friends as a part of their school experience here.
This past weekend was our first annual MAF ladies Retreat here in Tarakan. It was a one-night retreat at the local Swiss-Belhotel (which was really nice!). It was so nice to get together with all of the ladies here and have some fun, listen to Beth Moore teach on Loving Well, sing some songs and just relax. I am so privileged to be here to be a part of it.
We just welcomed a new couple to the program here, Chris and Sarah Desjardan (I can never remember how to spell their last name). They are in the process of getting settled into their new house, and then on Friday we will welcome another family coming back from furlough and moving to Tarakan. They were previously in Southern Kalimantan. So things will be busy with a welcome dinner for these two new families, plus Ryan's birthday party next Saturday.
Well, I sure miss you all of my friends! You can pray for me to be intentional about making time to spend with the Lord. I am feeling like I need to do this more, but it's just tough with everything that's going on! Let me know how you all are doing... Love ya, Linda

Lessons from a Turtle

The following is a story that happened to us a week ago with C.J.'s turtle "Tortilla" (Tor-til-a) (A combination of tortoise and tortilla!) Oh, and a big praise that our school books came in this week! Thanks for all who were praying for that!

The sermon really touched my heart that Sunday - what I could understand of it. The pastor talked pretty fast, and since it was in Indonesian, I could pick up about half of what he said. But one thing I got as he read the parables of Jesus from Luke 15: God's heart is broken over sin and for the lost. He longs for them to repent and return to Him, like the Prodigal son.

It was such a good reminder. You would think that serving overseas like we do, the lost would always be our chief concern, but having children, being involved in a technical ministry, and sometimes just growing preoccuppied with the things of our own life, sometimes I can just plain forget about the lost. Can you relate?

Since it was such a stirring reminder, that next morning, I read our boys the parable of the prodigal son from Luke 15 so they could understand the pastor's message. Then we prayed and asked God to give us hearts like His.

Later that mornign, I asked C.J. to take his turtle outside to get some sun. I got busy doing other things and so did C.J. We can both get distracted rather easily. About a half-hour later I asked, "Where's Tortilla?" "I dont' know," was C.J.'s reply.

"What do you mean you don't know? Weren't you keeping an eye on her?"

"She was right over there." He pointed to a place in the grass no longer occuppied by the turtle. Frustration brewed up in me. I had to run an errand and I didn't have time to look for a turtle!

Distraught, C.J. meandered around the yard, poking in corners and looking under coverings of dried-up bamboo leaves - but no Tortilla. Soon, he gave up and I found him sobbing in his room. "I've failed Tortilla!" he sobbed. "I lost her."

As I tried to negotiate the line between my parental irritation at his negligence, my disbelief that such a slow creature could completely disappear from our yard, and my frustration at needing to be somewhere else, my heart was touched by C.J.'s absolute brokenness over his lost turtle. I felt the Lord whisper, "Just stay with him for a while." After asking internally for God's direction, I urged C.J. to not be too hard on himself, but to call his friend who knew a lot about turtles, and ask him if he had any advice about where to look, and to pray that he could find Tortilla.

While C.J. was doing that, I grabbed a flashlight and decided to try my luck (even though it's not luck) at looking underneath the house. Logically, it's the only place she could have gotten to in the amount of time that C.J. had left her on the grass. I headed down the cement steps that went to the carport below the house. From there I could shine the light into the dark crevace taht was underneath the house. And there, sure enough, though I only swher because she stuck her head out, was Tortilla, the now naughty turtle who had run away.

"C.J.!" I cried excitedly, loud enough so he would hear me from the house, "I found her!" C.J. tore out of the house and down the stiars - smiling from ear to ear. We rejoiced together. It was only then that our prayer from that morning rushed back into my mind. "C.J.," I said thoughtfully, "I think God just gave us an object lesson so we could experience how it feels for him to miss the lost like in those parables of Jesus."

"C.J. thought for a moment. "Maybe so, Mom."

"Are you glad to have your turtle back?"

"Oh, yeah!"

Once Tortilla was returned to her cage, we had a new appreciation for the silly creature, and a gentle reminder from the Lord about his love for the lost.

Hannah's Anniversary

Hey there everyone! Thank you SO much for all of your prayers and thoughts on Hannah's anniversary. I just know it makes a huge difference in our ability to make it through the hard things and even find joy in them to by thinking about the future that all of us who follow Jesus have in heaven! I think it just feels good to make it through August 2 - especially this year being here in Indonesia.

It was a busy weekend because we celebrated Dave's birthday on Saturday, and then Hannah's anniversary on Sunday. I think having things planned really helps because it gives us a sense of "control" in some ways that we're not completely at the whim of the day. After praying about it, we decided to ask our friends the Holstens if they wanted to come over and celebrate Hannah's anniversary with us. David and Natalie were here back when we were here before (back in the day!) and have been serving here ever since. So they knew Hannah, and their son Carter was a good friend with Hannah. Now they have four children (Carter, Grace, Luke and Zoe).

David and Natalie brought over some pictures of Hannah that they had from back around 2001 or so. It was neat to see them, and to talk and share about our memories. We remembered how Hannah and Carter used to play "brother and sister", and how Hannah became very interested in amphibians because Carter was. I am amazed sometimes at how many things I have forgotten. So it was special to remember together. Dave and I were reminiscing how Hannah used to not want to kiss him goodbye in the mornings so she would run and hide in the rolled up tikar (bamboo mat), right in the middle of it! Funny.

After sharing memories, the kids colored pictures in honor of Hannah (we ended up with a lot of butterflies) and then we went outside and released balloons together. I love doing that on her anniversary. It's so simple, yet there's something very symbolic about letting the balloon go and watching it go up to heaven. Dave reminded us that all of us who are in Christ will get to be together again someday. Some days I can live in that as a reality, and other days I find myself dwelling in my sadness. I know I'm only human. I do ask God to increase my faith so that I can live more days walking as if it were reality that I will see Hannah again. Not that I don't need to be sad - I think it's a fine line to balance our grief and be honest about it, but temper it with the hope that we have in Christ. For when I am really believing that this life isn't all there is, I find I am much more full of joy and confidence in the Lord.

One other thing I enjoyed doing was going down to MAF on her actual anniversary and sitting in the airplane that's dedicated to Hannah. (see picture above) It is special to me to have something that actually represents her here. I wondered how many stories have taken place in that airplane and how many people have been helped by it. It was special to have a tangible place to go to and something to touch that represents her here in Indonesia.

So, be encouraged everyone! This life isn't the end - someday we will get to be with our King, the Lord Jesus. But until then, I am so thankful for all of you and your prayers and your friendship. God bless you.